My Glance Turns to a Stare


As I stood in the front row of The Palladium last night and gazed up at the unbelievable vision of Faith No More, I felt my heart pumping so violently from my excitement and the booming thuds of the nearby speakers that I really thought it might pop out of my chest and take off like a helicopter into the ceiling of the ballroom.  I heard someone behind me scream to his friend, “Is this real? Is this really happening???!!!”  And I honestly wouldn’t have been able to answer him. 

The show began with a sultry version of the Peaches and Herb classic “Reunited”, which was both hilarious and logical, because after 10 plus years of being apart, they were finally reunited and it felt so good for all of us.  When they then went into “From Out of Nowhere” hard and fast, I felt my brain melt, my heart dissolve, and my loins electrocute.  My mind felt frozen in awe, yet my body was freaking the fuck out, screaming out the lyrics like a wild beast.  Everyone completely lost it.  The crowd frenzied into a pushing jumping wave of a mosh pit.  Crowd surfers were tossed to the front onto security guards like rag dolls, then with eyes wild with sheer adrenaline they giddily ran back into the crowd for more. 

I felt myself becoming smashed against the railing that separated the front row from the security guards and the stage, but I didn’t even care.  In fact I can’t remember the last time I felt so safe.  In that moment, my organs mashed against the hard metal, staring into the eyes of Mike Patton, raging out of my mind, I felt like I was in a cocoon of concert utopia.  No one could touch that feeling.  Elbows jabbed at my back as I transcended onto a secure plane of zen.

Watching a live performance by a band you once loved so much when you were 14-years-old is like awakening a past version of yourself.  Because when you really love a band in your adolescence, really feel like that band understands you the way that no one else does, you emmerse yourself so obsessively into that band that the music literally becomes a part of your DNA.  While seeing Faith No More perform in front of my bulging eyeballs, I could also see myself sitting in my bedroom as a teen, playing their “The Real Thing” tape over and over and over again while staring at the poster I had on my wall of them all in their underwear.  It brought me back to a time of out of control hormones and teen angst, and I became so overwhelmed thinking how happy I would have been at 14-years-old if I had known that one day I would be in Los Angeles, standing face to face with Mike Patton, rocking the fuck out. 

It was so out-of-body and surreal.  There they were, Mike Patton and Co., jumping and flailing and pounding and sweating all over the place, and we were right there.  My mind was racing and all I could think was how in the world could my life possibly be THIS good?  I mean I have bad days and a general longing for better and more in my life as most humans do, but none of the bad stuff entered my mind.  All I could do was bask in the now.

Mike Patton’s voice is insane.  How someone can go from the guttural shrieks of death metal to a soulful rendition of a BeeGee’s song in the blink of a sweat stung eye is just not human.  His range is so wide that he really could be any type of singer he wanted to be.  He could be that loungy smarmy guy in a leisure suit yucking it up for Vegas crowds.  He could also be a pissed off eardrum-tearing metal God.  But why should he choose?  He can just be BOTH.  So he is.  And none of it is strained.  His voice just melds to each genre with confidence and vibrato.  Not to mention the drool-inducing vision of Patton himself.  There is a whole lotta hot happening underneath that red hot suit.

During “Midlife Crisis”, I found myself wishing there was a way to actually have sex WITH a song.  Wild, depraved, dominatrix dungeon sex.

Faith No More played for two straight hours.  I didn’t want it to end.  So I will be returning to The Palladium tonight for their second night in LA.  My friends and I scored $20 tickets for the show, and we are going back for round two.  Friends who saw them perform in New York said the set lists for the NY shows were different, so I’m really hoping to hear “The Real Thing” tonight, because they didn’t play it last night.  I just need a few more hours in the presence of rock perfection.

Sharon, Mark, and myself moments before the show began.

November 30th set list:

Reunited, From Out of Nowhere, Everything’s Ruined, Caffeine, Evidence, Surprise! You’re Dead, Poker Face/Chinese Arithmetic, Last Cup of Sorrow, Cuckoo for Caca, Easy, Midlife Crisis, The Gentle Art of Making Enemies, Started a Joke, Epic, Ashes to Ashes, Just a Man, First Encore: Helpless, Chariots of Fire/Stripsearch, Spirit, Second Encore: We Care A Lot, This Guy’s in Love With You.

Here are all the videos from the show that I could find.  I put them in the order they played them.  Some are missing, but as I find footage for those songs I will add them.

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